Picky Eater Parent Pillows

'He's gotten so fussy.'

"I say it's broccoli, and I say, "Fuck It"."

"My son refuses to eat fish. What do you think is a good replacement?"

'I used to think I was the only one kids hated... I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for you guys.'

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

'Broccoli is biodegradable, you know, in case you want to throw it out before I eat it.'

"Please don't kill me."

'Oh come on! I can't be that bad!'

'Okay mum, I'll eat it all up. But I doubt I'll grow big and strong on this muck!'

'You had better eat those intestinal organs or there's no dessert for you!'

"Mummy said dinner was brussels sprouts tonight. What about we drop by the park and see if the old man sitting on the bench can feed us instead?"

'Strained Carrots Again? What am I being punished for this time?'

"I'll have the vegetable lasagne, hold the vegetables."

"Mouse? No. They contain cheese and I'm lactose intolerant."

'Do I have to give thanks for all the spinach, or just the bite I'm going to eat?'

'Is it organic?'

'Could I trade all of this for more of that?'

"She doesn't eat raw zebra... Where can we get Alaska wild salmon in cream truffle sauce in the middle of Africa?"

"Life is so unfair! There are already ants in the cake but none in the broccoli casserole!"

"Come on, honey, try just one Goliath pea. It's organic, locally grown, and GMO free."

"Trust me, it tastes good – you won’t like it."

"I guess that pretty well debunks the fruits and vegetables are good for you myth."

'I say it's spinach and the heck with it!'

"It's an ugly nose, but at least it gets rid of some broccoli."

"Can you test for broccoli and brussels sprouts too?"

"Do you want the rest of this mouse? It tastes gamey to me."

'Being omnivorous means we eat anything: That includes Brussel sprouts!'

I've learned that it doesn't do any good to slip broccoli to the dog under the table.

"Beans count as healthy vegetables but jelly beans don't? Not faaaiiir!!!"

"I changed my mind about eloping with you, Billy....my mother didn't fix broccoli for dinner after all!"

"That cat is just finicky...I think the cat food tastes just fine! How about you, Herb?"

'I don't want to eat this. I want to eat organic foods.'

"Locusts don't sound too bad compared to spinach."

"You know, if lima beans, cauliflower and broccoli tasted like candy and ice cream, we wouldn't have to go through this every night!"