Phones And Frustrations Pillows

"I'm not angry with you, I'm angry with life!"

Paper being carefully folded until it resembles a scrunched up paper ball.

"Your call is important to us. Your estimated wait time is less than five hours."

'My cellphone's driving me crazy, Doc! It's smarter than I am.'

'Thank you for calling the Zepco mattresses hotline...'

Heck Support.

"No one whose name is pronounced that way lives here."

"If you would like to listen to music while you are on hold press 1, If you would like some quiet time to work out how much this call is costing press 2, if...."

'I am so very frustrated! It's hard for you to understand, but you don't know the golf course.'

Caged Fury

"Hi! I'm on a hippo."

'Yes sir, we still have Mr Edwards on hold from last thursday...'

'If you want to pay your bill, press one. If you want to discuss your bill, press two. If you're frustrated because you can't just talk to a living, breathing, human being, press three.'

Voice Jail

"yetthhh, i hold..."

Feelings towards radios #5 Man angrily kicking a radio.

"to place an order, press one. To cancel an order, press two. For billing information, press three. For sale items, press four. For returns, press five. For customer service, press six. For the nearest location, press seven. To enroll in a memory course, press eight."

"This is NHS direct.You are in a queue,approximate waiting time is 4 hours."

'If this is the conflict resolution hotline, why are you ticking me off??!!

Confusing Parking Rules

"If you have a touch tone telephone, please choose from the following 12,847 options. . ."

When Cell Phone Users Go to Hell

"Your call is important to us, just not as important as whatever else we're doing."

"Give me a sec and I'll check your order."

"Your call is REALLY important to us, which is why we're going to spend a really... REALLY long time thinking about it before we answer."

"Your call is important to us. Please stay on the line until your call is no longer important to you."

"I'm keeping count of how many robocalls I get. What's sad is I only started today."

"To talk to someone in Customer Service, press one, but we're pretty sure you'll want to hear our other 12 options. . ."

"Eee! Ossifer! THis is a damn sight easier than online flippin' computing!"

"All of our operators are assisting other customers. Due to the unusually high volume of dumb questions, wait time will be longer than usual."

'I don't mind the obscene phone calls. But I object to them reversing the charges.'