Phone Renegade Gifts

"I haven't seen you look at your me-phone for five whole minutes. What gives?"

"The next dance will be ladies' choice."

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

BLACK HOLES, the space path of least resistance.

Man running from desk: 'I can't seem to get away from my work lately.'

Music Freak.

'Have you figured out our New Year's resolution?'

A man without a chicken on his head!

"That's my performance review!? Two thumbs up?"

"Brian, isn't Dry January and Veganuary enough?!!"

"When you are done exercising your finger, the cat would like to talk to you!"

'Looks like Ed Miliband's attempt to stop the race failed.'

"No, I did NOT get the memo about "Casual Fridays." Had I known I would have worn flats."

Marriage therapist's office is filled with erotic art.

Exams

'But this IS my mobile home!'

'I have an even better idea, Steve -- let's get married without living together!'

'Say, Doc, I'll need more of that steroid stuff for old King. He's still kind of peaked. Must need some heavy doses."

"Where do you keep the non-educational stuff?"

Solar Storm Expected!

'I can't read my New Year's resolutions -- I must have spilled beer on them last night.'

'My Ed is a lawyer. All of his New Year's resolutions have escape clauses.'

Leonardo Meets the I.R.S.

"You know how to whistle, don't you? Just pick up the phone and call the S.E.C."

Cluster Catastrophe

Confession. Terrible confession. My favorite kind. By day, I work at this caf

"...He's been going to work in a wheelie bin. He says its quicker, cleaner and less cramped"

"Well, I liked it until I read the reviews."

'The cows are out and are not expected back.'

'Just what kind of girl do you think I am?'

"I'm giving up giving up!"

Pirate Radio

Joe Franklin

Race car driver sees Pit crew member holding sign: Stop And Ask For Directions.

"This place is even weirder than I was led to expect."