Phobia Master Pillows

"Don't be afraid if you see a Martian. There's no such thing."

Dead Funny

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

Yeah, it's funny, but you'll see, in this house, it's the guy who screams the loudest...

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

"Why the gumboots? Well, I can't stand slimy things touching my feet..."

"Pencil eraser."

Unwelcome guests can be caught and thrown out...there is no need to kill them.

'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'

"So, Ms. Medusa. Let's talk about this fear of snakes you mentioned. Do you notice that it causes anxiety?"

'Dr. Wit specializes in treating patients with a fear of low places.'

"Mr. Carley, would you like to begin today’s session?" "Claustrophobic's therapy session today at 2:00"

What's Their Secret?

"No, not us. Do something every day that scares you."

"I wish I had known you have arachnophobia before I paid."

'You get to see the countryside, meet interesting characters and relax traveling this way. Besides, I'm scared of flying.'

'I knew I should have bought more insurance.'

"No, I'm scarier."

Death By Mattress

'Tell me again why we are afraid of chairs.'

'For claustrophobia. Take two tablets right before hiding under the bed.'

"Our surveillance indicates that Earthlings have a fear of right-angled triangles."

Bridegroom jumps in the hands of his bride after seeing a mouse

'Do you still think my fear of Scottish clowns is irrational?'

'Your, 'Never can come out in public' session is over. After I leave the room, you come out and slink away!'

"They've always scared the hell out of me."

On the planet Clowny, they are afraid of us.

'Boy I freak out when slimy things touch my feet...'

'Come back lads, it's 'armless.'