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"Wisdom is growing your hair long so the hairs growing in your ears don't show

"Behold the secret to happiness."

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

Zenemies.

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

Optimist

Corporate departments as a metaphor for growing up.

'I've got no problem with December, but what do I blog about the rest of the year?'

"Moulting"

"Oooh, I know what I want to be when I grow up: Retired!"

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

'That's your third bowl of gruel this week! What is this -- a feeding frenzy?'

"Hello - I'm from the future..."

"All a cat CAN do is strive for authenticity."

Scurile travels

'Isn't that wonderful? We both suffer from intellectual angst!'

“Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!?”

"I'm searching for a happy medium between sitting on a mountain top and eating cheese fries."

"Today's sermon will be followed immediately by a rebuttal from the opposition."

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

'Have you been working out?'

"I'm not really into organized religion, though I am very spiritual."

"I've deregulated Arthur, but he still doesn't run very efficiently."

Professor McWit, crushed by an avalanche of Philosophy 101 texts, proves again that a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.

'The Meaning of Life? -- you don't have a bad ticker, do you?'

"What if it's smarter than us?"

'I gave up hope of receiving a Genius Grant years ago. Now I'm basically shooting for the less impressive Mediocrity Grant.'

The sad case of the blind-men and the elephant.

"Bless me father for I have allegedly sinned."