Philosophical Drinker Pillows

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

'I like your 'glass-half-full' philosophy but not when it's a pint pot using a single malt whisky!'

'Sometimes I see problems and solutions with such clarity, I feel I've been infused with all the wisdom of the ages... THAT'S when I know I've had too much to drink.'

'Listen, if they didn't have alcohol in heaven, it wouldn't be heaven!'

Wine Lady

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

Dickens & Tolstoy Walk into a Bar: " . . . so, to make a short story long . . . "

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

'The secret to life, my friend, is hoppiness!'

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

'My - You've matured, my dear.'

"How is the dollar trading against the Martini today, Jack?"

"My feeling is that while we should have the deepest respect for reality, we should not let it control our lives."

"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Frankly, it beats Pandora."

"I was surprised myself, but living apart, seeing other people, and having virtually nothing to do with each other actually has made our marriage stronger."

'The first cocktail.'

'As soon as I mention Nietzsche - stop serving me, okay.'

The drinker.

"The meaning of life at a glance"

Bar Therapy

Cocktails and Peacocks

"It's beginning to appear as if I'll never have greatness thrust upon me."

'You're a nihilist, eh? — well, at least you have something to believe in.'

'Don't be too hard on sinners. If it weren't for sinning, we'd all be out of work!'

'I've turned another corner in my life.' 'One more corner and you'll be back where you started.'

"So, Ben, what do you want to be when you stop sponging off your parents?"

"2 glasses of wine at lunch, I think I'm Socrates..."

''Evening, Bob - the usual?'

'I am not, metaphysically speaking, as loopy as you seem to believe.'

"It was very amicable—I gave her everything."

Scariest Tactics

"I'll have an entendre...make it a double."

Freud's Bar: Introspection Hour.

'I can give up drinking and lead a normal life?- Make up your mind, will you?'