Philosopher Of The Cosmos T-Shirts

"...and at the edge of the universe it says 'Abandon hope, all ye who look beyond here'."

"Good game."

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

Outer Space Outsourcing

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

"An un-observed universe ceases to exist. Yeah right!"

Chiller Theatre

'BANG' and a cosmology institute appears.

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

Zenemies.

'This is embarrassing. By MY calculations, the universe should have collapsed in on itself last Wednesday.'

"You can't possibly know how I feel. Everybody likes you."

How life on Earth really got its start.

Coronavirus

Newton's Cradle Solar System

"Earth – Love the brand, hate the owners."

'...and at this point I'm afraid the tax laws become totally theoretical.'

'Oh-oh -- What hath He wrought now?'

"When I was your age, we wished on stars. Now, we wish on satellites!"

God with Earth Controller

'No, dear. I don't think the star on the Christmas tree will implode, and suck our living room into a black hole.'

'How can I get my baby to sleep?'

"It's scary that humans are our benchmark for intelligent life in the universe."

"We've all said things about heliocentricity that look bad when taken out of context."

Questions

"Uh-oh - climate change."

Couple stargazing: 'Now a word from our sponsor...'

'God?' Earth receives its first transmission from space.

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."