Phd Graduate Gifts

A Guide to Academic Gowns and Hoods

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

Eternal Student.

"You're going to have to submit to peer review eventually, Bradshaw!"

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

A boy is sat at a desk, with five plaques implying different qualifications he has earned from using social media.

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

Scientists are sexy

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

Thank you for not doing research that has already been done.

'I need to borrow your Ph.D. for a half hour tomorrow. I have a major problem to solve.'

'I'm afraid that the top investment banks are looking for more from job applicants than a 'Top Degree from the University of Hard Knocks'.'

'So you have a PhD, big deal, everyone working here has one! The question is, what can you really do?'

Ten Years to get the Ph.D

Rita's PhD defense wasn't going well."

"An excellent defense. Let's give her the doctorate."

'I'm pretty sure I have a Ph.D. I think one came bundled with my new computer.'

Meet the author

Peer-reviewed journal publication.

math faculty

"Millstone is not yet a full professor."

This is probably the only time that Clem's name and the title 'Ph.D' will be used in the same sentence.

Washington Crossing the Delaware, Having Been Invited to Join the Faculty at Princeton

"I totally meant to do that."

'And finally, sir, would you like your burger flipped by a Ph.D. in Philosophy, History or English Literature?'

Macroscope

"Your research is impressive, but you have too many original ideas to be credible..."

PhD

Psychology: Registering for this class is a No-Brainer

Some New Mortarboard Styles.

"Textbook."

"A Ph.D. in physics, experience in aerospace and rocketry...of course I can juggle."

"Your doctoral thesis so much reminds me of mine. No, wait a minute. I never had a doctoral thesis."

'Dr Seuss is awarded a PHD.'