Pet Tricks Gifts

"Honey, the dog learned a new trick. And now I owe him twelve dollars."

"That's impressive, but I asked you to roll over."

"She's all over YouTube."

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...

'Tragically, he wandered onto the discus portion of a track and field event.'

'He can't speak to the dead, but he can speak to the dead.'

'Hey, Fred -- want to see a stupid pet trick?'

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

'Hey Harry, you know you've been walking around with a biscuit on your nose for the last two hours?'

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

Tiny dog catches frisbee that spins him around in circles.

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

MacGyver's Cat: 'You see, I took your bed and two paper clips and made it my bed.'

"Are there treats? Just grab the treats and get outta there!"

'Big sale at the Dog Store. Buy 1, get 2 free.'

"Hello, Pine Grove Elementary? Could you tell Miss Pritchard to come to Lakeview Veterinarian Clinic right away?"

'What's amazing is that I only threw one stick.'

"What other tricks does he need?"

"I always get the 'Good Boy.' How about the 'Bad Dog' for a change?"

"Hello? Guys? Okay, I've had a long day and I'm very tired, so no pranks this time. I'm serious... guys?!"

The Goalkeeper

We're halfway through teaching her to roll over.

'He ate all the magnets off of the refrigerator.'

'I'll bet you taught him that!'

'Isn't it cute how Roscoe dances around when I come home?'

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

'I can see the practical side of fetching, but what's the point of rolling over?'

"That damn dog's scratching again!"

"I'll roll over but I refuse to play dead."

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

"I'm taking a gap year and then getting my Master's in Fetching and Staying."

"If anyone should ask, I was in my doggy bed from 7 p.m. to midnight. Understand?"

"Don’t worry. You’re looking at the Frederick H. Tuttle Middle School long-jump champion."

"It was trick to assemble, as my lab assistant kept taking bones and burying them outside."

'Dog got your clog?'