Pet Puffer T-Shirts

Clown walking his balloon dog.

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

Cat Reunion

'Big sale at the Dog Store. Buy 1, get 2 free.'

"Yes, one is a dog."

"The library rejected your request to ban all books on cats and squirrels. But, to be fair, it was no dumber than all the other book ban requests we get."

'Iguana know what time it is.'

Dog Walker

Robot walking pet robot

"It's just a jogger!" "It's just a car!" "There's nothing out there now!" "I was thinking of the squirrel I saw last week"

"Let's see now: All dogs have four legs. I have four legs. Therefore, I am a dog."

"Dogs are men."

"I'm not a mad dog. But I'm not particularly happy either."

'I'm trying to toilet train them.'

"I'm telling you! They don't know anything! No one is in charge!"

"When I get to heaven do you think I'll get my testicles back?"

Musical Pipe

The Inner Dog.

Cat on a psychiatrist's couch: 'Truth is, I'm not really a cat person.'

Dog to other: 'I think I'm becoming quite addicted to pats on the head.'

"Actually, There's a lot less pressure since I've gone from his best friend to his therapy dog."

"You've got to understand, in my family Dad was the poodle and Mom was the pit bull."

Grammarian.

'Ah look, what a lovely tortoise shell cat.'

"You need a hobby."

Fish Food

"These dizzy spells, I have a theory."

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

"Ugh, tell me about it! They pressure you to be a good boy and I get unreal expectations of prettiness!"

"Pet peeves" "I fear the cat." "I fear the cat" "I fear the cat." "Fecced me."

'That's Princess... formerly 'Prince'.'

'Oh, that is so simplistic. Why must you always see the world in black and white?'

Headstone in bird cage, "We really loved our budgie.."

'Sure, I can talk, but I still feel culturally illiterate.'