Pet Name Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Will you please stop calling me 'Pretty Polly', my name is Rodney.'

'I see you've already met Fluffy.'

"You have to decide, Peter. Am I your significant other or am I your tootsie-wootsie?"

"… She's simply asking that you no longer refer to her as 'the dog.'"

"Look, I'm sorry — I didn't mean to refer to you as 'the dog.'"

"The kid's name is Fluffy, the cat, Fuzzy Joe."

"My owners named me Kvduer92hybH20UDF8fhsj becuase they wanted to remember a strong password for their online banking."

"I'm not sure if we're named after passwords or vice versa."

"Pick me!"

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

Canine Companion

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

"Okay, you both know the rules: no trash talk, no batting the other guy all over the house if he’s unconscious, watch the claws and nails..."

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

" 'Grrr' is not a word."

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

'What was all that swerving at the cat walk?'

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

Love Conquers All

"He's already getting attached to you."

Couple sitting in living room reading books while dog reads a book with a cat shaped cover.

"Did you get my tweet?"

"I could catch a bicyclist, well maybe not a bicyclist, but I could catch a jogger, definitely."

Pets.

"Look. They say sit, you sit. They say roll over, you roll over. Where's the prob?"

'Other dogs howl at the moon, I've trained mine to play Bach.'

"If you can’t beat ’em, roll around in their decaying carcass."

"The video of you eating my $700 John Varvatos got 300 'likes.'"

Author's Bio-diversity.

Sign at vet's says 'Cat's waiting area'. Cat says to dog with head in cone: 'Oi, mate, can't you read?'

'I've drawn up a shortlist of baby names.'

'Now there's a vet that needs a holiday,'