Pet-loving Screen Addict Gifts

"Your screen time is up, but your dog time is down."

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

Boy with a whale: 'He followed me home, Dad, can I keep him?'

Tamagotchi paralysis.

"What? Don't yuck my yum!"

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

"He was a dog person, I was a cat person, the answer was a ferret."

"Lap fish..."

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

Upper East Side Dog Park

Woman keeping a chicken in her room for fresh eggs

'He won't eat his lettuce until I've washed it five times. I'm sure his OCD is getting worse!'

'Click it or ticket.'

'You see, I didn't lie, the Internet is full of puppy and kitten videos: We could make a fortune!'

'I'd like the tongue, please.'

Priest with the Pet Devil.

Doggy-3D

'Oh, that's Corky's way of saying hello.'

"I love these fitness bracelets! it's like having a tamagotchi, but the tamagotchi is you."

'Apart from Charlie here, I don't have any problems with slugs'

The pet shop of Doctor Moreau

Cat on a psychiatrist's couch: 'Truth is, I'm not really a cat person.'

Fish in Water Cooler.

'It's only temporary until we can find a good home for the cats.'

'Mutt is very insulting and definitely politically incorrect, but where do I find an animal rights attorney at this hour of the night?'

"My Instagram feed is basically people, dog food and tennis balls."

Joey tries to teach his pet rock how to swim.

When Pugs dream.

A sausage dog shrinking after toileting

'Interesting. . . 'While dogs respond to dog whistles, wolverines respond only to cash and traveler's checks.''

"She's a weiner cat."

'Nature abhors a vacuum. Nature is my cat.'

"No, thanks Bob. And just exactly when did you decide you were a 'dog person'?"

"Does he byte?"

'Why do they refuse to drink water out of a bowl that's been left out for two hours, but go gaga over toilet water?'