Pet Loving Relative T-Shirts

"I wonder how much she gets for those."

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

Dog Hunting Trophies.

'Why can't my walks be that fun?'

"Is that true, Charles? You leave your crap all over the house?"

"This never happened."

"Your love gives me strength."

"No I said fetch , not wretch.."

"I see you mister mail carrier... that's it, just keep walking... don't even think abo—did you just look at my house?! Are you looking for trouble? Cujo ain't got #!@* on me."

"Do you remember ordering 1,345 cans of tuna?"

Dog and family arrive at 'Mount Ruffmore' National Park, instead of Mount Rushmore.

"Look, I tried to tell everyone Timmy was in the well but no, what do I know, I'm just a dog!"

"C'mon. Get out there and go tinkle already."

"Sorry - my dog is at the vet. This one is a loaner."

'He's never going to graduate. How about giving him an honorary degree instead?'

'I thought this was a documentary about animal cruelty.'

This is Roscoe, our first pooch

'Too old to climb curtains, but young enough to climb on a lap. What's not to love.'

'Mutt is very insulting and definitely politically incorrect, but where do I find an animal rights attorney at this hour of the night?'

'No, Mrs. Dudley! If there's a bone in a chair, that means it's reserved for Marmaduke!'

The definitive turning point in The Great Terrier-Squirrel War was the now-famous Trojan Acorn Maneuver.

'You see, Doctor, we've never had any children...

'After we had him declawed he started taking on a tougher persona to compensate.'

'In the future you will address me as 'Your Royal Highness'.'

"Do you think those sounds they make are some primitive attempt to communicate with each other?"

"He's so old I usually let him do what he wants."

'Who are you and what do you want?'

Cat Graduation

"The meaning of life is cats."

'I told you he was smart. He turned a potential hazard into a plaything.'

101 uses of a dead cat: chopping board.

"Next time, don't rake with the dogs."

'Coming through a pet door isn't as easy as it looks.'

''No' means, 'Don't do that while I'm in the room.''

'Stop barking, Winston!'