Pet Language Decoder Pillows

'Polly's certainly picked up some new phrases since Ernest started working from home.'

"Look, he just wants to apologize for scaring the daylights out of you yesterday. ... Mr. Squirrel? ..."

"And here is the very stone that finally enabled us to figure out what all those dogs and cats were saying."

Dog Training.

Dogs texting each other emojis

"Since you're always asking, here's a list of my various kinds of sighs, with explanation of what each one means."

"I've lived among them my entire life, and I can tell you, 'fetch,' 'roll over,' 'sit,' 'stay,' and 'bad dog,' is the extent of their vocabulary."

"Why do you wear green lipstick?"

English Pointers giving pointers.

"I'm sorry I ever taught him to speak"

'Right there is where he departs from the script.'

"Our researchers have discovered that 'E' is the most common, and only, letter in the dolphin alphabet."

'Hurry, hurry! What's he saying?'

"I actually know more commands than I respond to."

"I can actually hear you thinking about food."

Performance anxiety lessons, the more you practice something.

"People...do you FINALLY understand the concept of 'Visual Narrative?'"

'Up until now I thought all your questions were rhetorical.'

"How are we supposed to know what's bothering him when we don't speak bark?"

"I have to go out for a few hours, and don't give me any attitude about it."

Prince longed for the good old days when dogs were dogs.

'Pet, we've got to talk.'

'Daddy says 'meow'.'

'Every friend is a potential security breach.'

Marooned Optometrist

"Theo, conversation is about talking and listening!"

"You should only believe half of what I tell you."

Dog dictionary/Dog Alphabet.

'I demand a second opinion!'

Two tourists inspecting a French sign

'Your voice says 'no' but your tail says 'yes'.'

"If we could decipher their language we'd have a clue to their intelligence levels."