Personal Safety Advocate Pillows

'Just checking my anti-rape alarm...'

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

Pool attached to child's bed.

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

Man using to much bug spray

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

Cricket Accidents.

Cafe Burns.

"Have you met my bodyguard?"

Reasonableman

"Careful."

'Mum...Dad's barbecued his face again.'

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

'In my day, we didn't concern ourselves with wimpy notions of workplace ergonomics.'

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

'Okay - who removed Jessica's sunhat..?'

Man who has hailed a taxi finds the driver is a crash test dummy.

Knights Wing Mirrors.

Kangaroo: Baby on Board

"Slide, Howie!!! Slide!"

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

Boozing and Cruising

"You're right. I have to come up with a brake of some kind."

"Here comes the super-visor."

"How would you rate your toleration for risk?"