Period Positivity Advocate Pillows

'Wot wine goes good wit' bein' on da rag, a**hole!'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"The document states that you've been left your mother's jowls and upper arm flab."

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

"Privates Beach"

'Amazing! We truly do live in a classless society.'

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

Critisize your weight.

'My diet seems to be working great! Do you have any less relaxed jeans?'

'I tried being pessimistic. I was terrible at it.'

Breast Height Chart

'You've still got the right stuff, only now it's in the wrong places.'

'It's the same model... he painted the second one eight months after the first painting.'

'I gotta lose some weight.'

"That's a big fat lie!"

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

"I really didn't have a weight problem until they invented skinny jeans."

Hips may appear larger than they actually are.

"I don't think anyone will notice your ninty seven pound lime green lycra swimming trunks Terry."

Aging Problems

Queen Kong

"I don't care what it was or how hard it was to kill. It makes me look fat."

"My Weight Watchers meeting's tonight. I'd better get inside."

"When you're healed, I'm going to wear it so I can't see what I weigh."

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

'I'm feeling so good, I'm worried I may catch some uplift anxiety.'

"Give me your metabolism! Now!"

'Call Me Old-Fashioned, But I Liked It Better When They Didn't Shave Their Armpits.'

'Good News. Further x-rays revealed the big shadow on your lung to your stomach.'

Fat fairy

"I'm pretty sure the middle-aged upper-arm jiggle is the one thing there's not a niche market for."

Girl's weight issues.

'Good grief! Who CARES where our tails begin?'

"So has this obsession about your weight ever led to thoughts of suicide?"