Penalty Kicks Gifts

Footballer's Wages

"England losing from a penalty shootout again!"

Goalkeeper makes the wrong save.

Footballer holding team mates bum while preparing for a penalty shoot out

'He's definitely heading for a red card.'

'Half-time, full-time - It's gone into penalties, woman!'

'And remember...no sudden moves in the shoot out.'

Goal

'Hand in the area, penalty!'

'New rule. From now on you don't just sit in the penalty box. You also get a root canal.'

Ref shows footballer green card.

"Seven bookings and four sendings off, and that was just in the queue for pies."

Penalty

'Uh-oh. That's the 'special' whistle. ... This is going to be a major penalty.'

On this date: Overly enthused and attending an NHL game en masse, the National Parole Board exceeds its mandate.

'We call it 'Fred'. He's our best penalty kicker.'

"Your reputation for taking penalties doesn't scare me... Ready when you are."

"Oi! Whose side are you on, ref?"

'He's one of the strictest referees in the competition...'

1981 - Introduction of goal nets and penalty kicks to the newly-formed Football League.

'You're not allowed out of the Coach's Penalty Box.'

"An own-goal and a rebound penalty, huh!"

Deathbed Conversion

"We're offering a free rubber bust of Roy Hodgson you can throw at the telly if it goes to penalties.'

'We call it 'Fred'. He's our best penalty kicker.'

'Penalty'

'He was warned. One more 'T' and he'd be gone.'

'There goes a flag... could be a face-mask penalty.'

'I think it will be a very competitive season. Most of the league's key players are out on bail.'

Football Hand of God.

'Death penalty'

Honey I wish you wouldn't bring your home with you