Penalty Dodger Pillows

'He escaped!'

"I never dreamed the substantial early withdrawal penalty was the fund itself."

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'No, I'm not stranded. This is the only place I could find that has no distractions.'

'I hope I run out of money before I flunk out.'

"The cat told me to eat your homework."

Bless me father, for I have sinned...my brother did it.'

"I can't get used to being a grownup."

"I think before we begin to address me, we need to talk about the clown in the room."

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

'Daniel! How many times have I told you not to bury that in the back yard! I'm going to be late for work!'

I'm writing the Great American novel, one bill at a time.

"I'm taking 'moving back in with the parents' studies."

"If you miss a payment, we show up and embarrass you in front of your friends."

'Whatever you do, don't tell them you think you're ready to take on more responsibility!'

Hear me, Graduates!

'It's been a pretty slow day -- What say we knock off a couple hours early?'

Financial Advisor. The next time you let your inner child out to play, don't let him play with your credit cards.

"I know it's not in our nature, but we really gotta stop charging everything."

"Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember the college's financial plight. Congratulations. Please remember . . ."

"Let's just say my teacher and I agreed to disagree."

'Now,they're going to teach you to talk, but remember, after you learn how.stay away from religion or politics.'

"With great power comes zero responsibility."

It's an I-O-Ewe.

Please Wait Here To Be Scolded

'So, who's first?'

Kicking The Habit

'It will take all my nine lives to pay off my student loans.'

"How was first grade? I don't know yet. I spent all day in the Principal's office."

Updated Proverbs. We come into the world with nothing. And leave deeply in debt!

"Whoops! There go those darned interest rates again!"

'Maybe I haven't made myself clear enough. I really don't want to be disturbed today!'

'Financial suicide hotline. How may I help you?'