Pedicure Perfectionist Gifts

Differing thoughts of male and female.

'Now, will you consider cutting your toenails?'

Surfer Blowing Back His Hair.

'Needs salt!'

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

'Beer brewery? No, I wanted the witches brew! Damn GPS.'

"It took a lot of work to build this car..."

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

'Quick, press control Z!'

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

"Relax, Dad... I'll put your toothbrush away when I'm done. I always do."

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

Bread maker, coffee maker, tea maker, pasta maker.

"This painting will make you so famous that you won't be able to walk down the street without being recognised."

"We'd like bruschetta, and we'd like it pronounced correctly."

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

Sleeping on the Job

Staycation Photos

'I told you I only cook with my mother's Italian spices. She just left Naples and should be here with them in about eight hours.'

The Manicure.

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."

'..and one for the pot.'

Social lens of the photojournalist

"Dad, you don't understand...I can't get my hair cut just anywhere! This is for school pictures! My hair needs to be perfect!"

The Garra Rufa's idea of a Grand Day Out.

"Eye of newt. . . wing of bat. . . hair of dog!"

"At what point did my Boeuf Bourguignonne become a pejorative beef stew?"

A conductor practising in front of a mirror.

'That will be $600, thank you...'

My shampoo tones, colors, tints and conditions. Now if it would just make my hair presentable.'

"Dang it, my eyes were closed - take another one!"

"Don't make me look fat!"

Artist paints UNDO icon onto canvas.

"He hasn't the heart to discharge her. She's been with him for years."