Pecan Lover Gifts

'Luggage is free, but it now costs $50 for our complimentary bag of peanuts.'

Any time is cake o'clock

Where Indian ink came from.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

"I thought there would be bacon here."

'Look at that! Peanuts!'

"Our cook is new, so ge's Googling what goes on a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich as we speak."

"I've had it with you guys! From now on, have your arguments on your own time!"

"Finally a perfume store my husband will enjoy visiting."

Aromatherapy for Men

'In celebration of Thanksgiving, this week's pie charts are all pumpkin flavored!'

'Mom, where does bacon come from?'

"Someone has eaten our porridge, let's have pancakes."

"Habanero ..."

"If I have this peanut in my pocket, it means I must have buried my keys!"

Produce Market. Lots of things are going on with the produce. The tomatoes, as usual, are having a fruit or veggie identity crisis. Though it makes no sense, the apples and oranges are constantly comparing themselves to one another. The plums are happy. Any assignment or position that comes their way is always the best. That potatoes want couches, of course. And the bananas think they should run the market government. Sure, a banana republic!

"We did it! Barbeque, bacon, cheese and just a twist of kale!"

Man proposes using strong flour as a ring.

"Here there is all the bacon, pizza and beer you could desire. But do not eat from the Tree of Tofu lest you should lose paradise."

'Sticky nuts...' "Umm nice nuts but not as sticky as us buns!!"

Because of bad weather and lots of people moving slowly on the path, it took forever to get here! Everybody was picking up a pumpkin on Wednesday. There was a huge crowd and long lines at the pumpkin patch. My brother and I can't be seated together today. We'd argue and disagree about who should run the village council. After this huge meal nobody's gonna want to stick around and clean up this mess! If they're still having this celebration centuries from now, I'm sure they'll have worked i

"Mom, Eugene picked all the peanuts off the pizza!"

'This feeling of passion I have for you ...'

"No religious nuts!"

"Mini-cupcakes never solved anything."

'So why do you need a ladder to eat a pancake'

"Maybe selling the cow for a bag of beans was a bad deal, but my cholesterol has never been better!"

'You, you, you. It's always about you.'

'Okay! Okay! I'll talk! I'll talk! Please, just don't eat any more bacon!'

Chef looking up confused, Waiter behind him with pancake on his head.

'This is me at my most masculine.'

The vow of silence. Some days it was really hard to keep.

At Halloween a little kid leaves the house wearing his father's construction clothes, tool belt and hard hat. In the window is a pumpkin with a hard hat on.

Listen, I'll put chocolate chips in your flapjacks, too, but I ain't makin' smiley faces with 'em.

"I just want to know if I'm healthy enough for bacon?"