Peanut Pro Pillows

'You fight the Gluten Hordes, make your way through the Peanut Fields, battle the Lactose King...'

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

"He's not talking yet, but sometimes we give him peanut butter to make it look like he is."

'The school bus drove off without me. The driver said she couldn't allow one more peanut butter sandwich on her bus.'

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

'Look at that! Peanuts!'

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

"He has a terrible peanut elegy."

Table Of The Elephants

"You finished with your peanuts?"

Jelly I.V.

"And it shall be called peanut butter. And it shall appear as if perishable or in need of refrigeration but in truth it shall remain shelf-stable for months, though the oil may separate and require stirring. And there shall be a crunchy variety and there shall be a smooth variety. And . . ."

"If I have this peanut in my pocket, it means I must have buried my keys!"

"The nurse thinks she's sneaky, but I know my meds are in the peanut butter."

'Peanuts, popcorn, steroids!'

'My final offer.'

'This feeling of passion I have for you ...'

"No religious nuts!"

'Here's a bag of nuts if you get hungry.'

"Mom, Eugene picked all the peanuts off the pizza!"

"How was I supposed to know she was allergic?"

"That's your separation anxiety? When the oil separates in your all-natural peanut butter?"

'We know it's your dream, son. But stay in school. Get your degree. Don't pin all your hopes on a major league career.'

'I can't help you, it seems you really are npsycuts!'

For the Love of Peanut Butter

'What happened to the free peanuts?'

"No thanks, just the peanuts."

"Keep it open."

Think Small.

See, Peanut? I told you that 'Melt in your mouth, not in your hand' line would get you in trouble someday!

'I think we're in luck. This judge likes 'nut' cases.'