Peanut Pun Lover Pillows

'I think we're in luck. This judge likes 'nut' cases.'

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

'The school bus drove off without me. The driver said she couldn't allow one more peanut butter sandwich on her bus.'

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

'Look at that! Peanuts!'

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

"He has a terrible peanut elegy."

'He can't be all bad if he still likes peanut butter.'

Table Of The Elephants

"You finished with your peanuts?"

"And it shall be called peanut butter. And it shall appear as if perishable or in need of refrigeration but in truth it shall remain shelf-stable for months, though the oil may separate and require stirring. And there shall be a crunchy variety and there shall be a smooth variety. And . . ."

"If I have this peanut in my pocket, it means I must have buried my keys!"

"The nurse thinks she's sneaky, but I know my meds are in the peanut butter."

'I'd like something with a high amount of vegetable protein, a bit of glucose or dextroe for energy, and some fiber.' 'One peanut butter and jelly on toast.'

'My final offer.'

"No religious nuts!"

'Here's a bag of nuts if you get hungry.'

"The guy I bought him from says he's a pure sheepdog."

"Mom, Eugene picked all the peanuts off the pizza!"

'This feeling of passion I have for you ...'

"I hab peenut buffer stok to woof of my mout!"

For the Love of Peanut Butter

"That's your separation anxiety? When the oil separates in your all-natural peanut butter?"

'We know it's your dream, son. But stay in school. Get your degree. Don't pin all your hopes on a major league career.'

Dogs Home: Beware of the Human

'I can't help you, it seems you really are npsycuts!'

'What happened to the free peanuts?'

"I'd trade, but peanut butter sticks to my tongue stud."

"He never outgrew his love of milk and cookies. He just added beer and peanuts."

"It's like as soon as we got married the man became so stupid we can't even remember how to slap some peanut butter on a cracker."