Peaceful Entrepreneur Pillows

"You chant for inner peace. I'm chanting for a development deal."

'Truth is fine, but I really need marketable ideas.'

"Just go with the workflow."

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

Dog selling toilet water on front lawn

'Nothing like being your own boss, huh?'

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind, and cash-flow."

"Tea parties are passé. I'm opening a craft brewery."

Rudolph's off-season side hustle

"When I was making money, I made the most money, and now that I'm spiritual I'm the most spiritual."

"I got napkins, family photos, and the strongest lip balm in the city."

"I'm hoping to sell my startup - a chain of fast-food meditation centers - to Google for seven figures."

"So that's my presentation: Could I have 100 million for the startup?"

Unchanged … and yet completely changed. Tao Jones Indexes.

'Do you realize, this is a land of opportunity?' - 'Yes, anyone can become a tax payer.'

'How I love Global Warming... Otherwise, it would be necassary to look for a -BLEEARGH!- serious job!'

"We managed to outsource our strategic development team to a company in Beijing that will say 'yes sir no sir' for 25% less."

'Seven companies in three years.'

"It has yet to turn a profit."

How to Succeed in Business - Strategy 2: Build relationships at the highest level.

'Our Community Mental Health Foundation has given us a grant NOT to broadcast the stock market news.'

It's nice to finally find a town big enough for the both of us.

'Now that's my kind of green technology!'

"I wasn't always a big success in business. In fact, I'm still not."

Buy Low and Sell High Gurus

'And what makes you think there's a market for golden eggs?'

'I'm thinking of starting a religion. What would be a reasonable initial investment?'

"We've come a long way from our humble beginnings."

'I used to think I couldn't serve both God and Mammon, and then I discovered multitasking!'

'In my years of meditation, I've concluded that being a prophet without profit is not the path to nirvana.'

'I should've known it sounded too good to be true!'

"As soon as we attain Nirvana, we can start selling franchises!"

"This tastes the same...why the different price?"

"I'm pretty well stocked, but you can leave me your card if you like."

Angel talking to broker