Pawn Patron Pillows

"They claim they're being used as pawns and are filing a lawsuit."

"I'll have another Rob Roy and a cup of coffee for my friend here."

“I may not know much about books, but I do know which titles burn best.”

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

'The Saxon King' pub

Surreal ale

'We always like to give more bling for the buck.'

'I don't think we're devoted to the Lord. I think we're devoted to dessert.'

'I can't sleep for thinking about global warming.'

"Gotta go, lads, I smell death."

"I just saw some confused old goat pee all over the bathroom floor." "That was a mirror. And that wasn't the bathroom."

'Where I come from it's called collateral.'

"Ignore gordon. He's had a snootfull."

Pub Kendo.

"It's easy for me. Three beers and I'm in the zone."

Bike powered computer.

'Your wife doesn't understand you. . .'

Prawn Shop

'I badly need to speak to my husband - can you get me a job as a barmaid?'

Sadly, there are those who take advantage of bunnies down on their financial luck.

"Last chance — where’s the wet food?"

'One thing about beer -- you never get buyer's remorse.'

'Can you do me a low alcohol tequila slammer?'

'Boozer's Week.'

Pawnshop: Genuine Fake Watches.

"No thanks, just the peanuts."

"Well, I would consider offering you more for it if it were right, say, three times a day."

Village Pet Shop.

Magritte Man with Xmas pudding instead of apple.

Who's Not Who.

"Right - let's get back to the house and pretend to hate each other..."

"Do you realize that we spend one-third of our lives in bed and the other two-thirds in here?"

'I said I wanted a cake with a naked bird coming out of it.'