Paw-some Humor Prints

'You Know Who got into my closet.'

"It get it – you're hungry."

'Table scraps, doggie-bag goodies, dropped hot dogs, the cat's dish of food and your master's slippers.'

Hush puppy.

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"Do you recall the exact moment the balance of power shifted?"

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

Dog wearing a cone

Dog fetching clown shoes.

'Sit, Rollover, Heel'

"I'm not his best friend. But he is in my extended network."

"Ask the gumshoe. He'll tell ya the saucer was empty when I got there. Go on, gimme a purr detector test. I got all night."

"I'm thinking sixty nine."

'You're the watchdog. Do you honestly expect us to believe you didn't see anything?'

The Karate Kitten.

"If anyone should ask, I was in my doggy bed from 7 p.m. to midnight. Understand?"

'No need to shout.'

"FYI – your camel hair blazer started it."

"Did you know that cats aren't mentioned anywhere in the Bible?"

"I'll have the 'All you can eat from the menu, the kitchen, and the dumpster' special."

"You're God-knows-where all day long, then at night you pounce on my head... this is not a relationship."

'Other than no dognip or an indoor bathroom, I enjoy being a dog.'

Jerry had a difficult time coming up with cartoon ideas over the noise his dogs made. '...so then the cat says, 'No, thanks. I'll clean it myself.' 'Ha,ha! Yeah, that's a good one,Phil!'

A sausage dog shrinking after toileting

I was allowed to chew this. But not that

"Looks like we'll be eating leftovers for a month!"

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

"Do you think those sounds they make are some primitive attempt to communicate with each other?"

'That's the problem with Dacshunds, you can never tell whether they're coming or going.'

'I want a straightforward answer: Did you or did you not willfully claw a flea to death on your left ear?'

Dogs at Dog Show Judging the Judges.

"It's OK! Stop splashing!"

Hang Time Fido

'Ma'am, I think I already see the problem with your cuckoo clock.'

'Play dead.'