Pattern Seekers Gifts

'Amazing this pizza looks just like a brain scan of someone who's experiencing apophenia'

The Art Student.

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

Pampered and poodled.

"And now. . . which shoes?"

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

"I hear you've been doing exciting things with eggs and dye."

Man admiring his patterned clothes in the mirror

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

Mister Pretty Shoes

Goldilocks and the seventeen black shoulder bags

"I don't like your application."

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

"Some fitting room. Nothing fits!"

"Do you do much walking?"

'Trust me, it's very proper to mix stripes.'

"I always end up buying way more black-truffle honey than I intended."

"I feel there's a whole culture around mules."

"Of course, lots of women are just going bare-headed."

Elegant woman in backless dress.

"I'm starting to think stripes."

"You won't believe this but I haven't a thing to wear"

Changing Room Decisions