Patriotic Party-goer T-Shirts

Happy Fourth of July!

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

"I guess I was a good shot, because I took down 50 Nazis...all by myself. That's how I got my silver star. Honestly, I don't consider myself a hero. I consider myself lucky."

"I am so attracted to you right now."

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

Thank you to those who never came home and to those who never left their side.

'Not only do I have a black belt in karate, I also have a husband in the hospital to prove it!'

Redhead

It had been a while, but he had finally come home.

Carioca

'And now, please stand and join us as complete amateur butchers our national anthem.'

'Having algorithm and having rhythm are 2 different things.'

Christmas sweater alternatives

Leo McKern

Guy dressed as an ostrich at a fancy dress party. Lump in birds throat like a real bird.

Old veteran walking in sun casting a giant shadow as a young soldier

Healthcare workers come to the N.H.S. Fancy dress party dressed as viruses.

Veterans Day US

"My wife and I handle our own finances. I'm an accountant and she's a grief counselor."

"I'm floating in pure vodka; feel free to dip your glass in if you'd like."

Monk on the beach

"My compliments to the sommelier."

"I'll cross any ocean to fight for our country! I'll travel to the gates of hell to defend our rights!"

"...and what do you think will happen if you do attend the party?

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

"Aperitif?"

"Happy Birthday - I saw this and thought of you."

'At that moment, across a crowded room, their thighs met.'

Down on Bourbon Street...

'Give you liberty or give you death? That's easy for you to say. You have nine lives.'

"Are you pleased to see me or is that a vuvuzela down your trousers?"