Patience Maestro Pillows

Waiting for Waldot

'Are we there yet?'

'Sure, long waits don't bother you. You've served time.'

"I guess someone got up on the wrong side of the podium today."

"But this time, Lucky, when I throw the ball... you bring it back!"

Guru.

'Are you done yet?'

How to identify the alarming mood swings of male menopause.

"I can't solve for X. I have a fear of the unknown!"

'I home-schooled all seven kids. Right now I'm in the teacher's lounge.'

'I'm ready! You ready?...You ready?'

Phone solicitors like customers who are afraid to hang up.

"This isn't a bad time to be out of touch with reality."

"I think my Harry must be practicing some sort of Tantric fishing. He'll be at it for hours and not catch a thing."

"I'm worried that I'm the only one who constantly gets anxiety attacks..."

"Your call is important to us. Your estimated wait time is less than five hours."

'You wouldn't believe how hard it is for me to unwind after work.'

Women

'Honey. . . I'm ommmmmmmmmmmmmmm.'

Road work next 15 years.

A knowledge of where the fish are likely to be located can save hours of frustration.

'This is wonderful. It will help millions of people.'

Due to higher-than-usual caller volume, your wait-time is nine minutes. That's over an hour in wolverine minutes.

'I like to spend my train journeys reading fiction.' (He looks at Rail Timetable. Sign says 'Delays expected'.)

'Maybe you just weren't cut out for enlightenment.'

'The fifth rule of parenting. . . cross that bridge when you come to it.'

'Was that a spiritual insight, or just clumsiness?'

Meditation: Do Not Disturb.

"Here goes nothing."

'I DID work out today, doc. Sitting all afternoon in your waiting room was a real exercise in frustration!'

"I pick up most of my wisdom from celebrity interviews.'

'Sorry to interrupt - your monastery is on fire...the IRS wants to talk to you - and something about a missing case of wine.'

"I'm not doing this because I like it. I'm doing this because I love you."

'Sorry I'm late. I had you booked as the gastroenteritis, on Mont Blanc.'

Someone being taught how to conduct an orchestra.