Patience Haver Gifts

Windows are just for show.

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

'A representative will be with you in twelve minutes... so, if you have to go to the bathroom, please go now...'

"Lord, business is slow and I'm getting frustrated. If I change my name to 'Job' would that give me more PATIENTS?"

Fishing.

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

'I'm ready! You ready?...You ready?'

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

Snail crossing

Women

"Your call is important to us. Your estimated wait time is less than five hours."

"I think my Harry must be practicing some sort of Tantric fishing. He'll be at it for hours and not catch a thing."

'You wouldn't believe how hard it is for me to unwind after work.'

Road work next 15 years.

'This is wonderful. It will help millions of people.'

A knowledge of where the fish are likely to be located can save hours of frustration.

"Wow, I'm upset. I didn't think I could get upset anymore... crazy."

'I like to spend my train journeys reading fiction.' (He looks at Rail Timetable. Sign says 'Delays expected'.)

Due to higher-than-usual caller volume, your wait-time is nine minutes. That's over an hour in wolverine minutes.

I'm a bolt, dummy! Does everything look like a nail to you?!

"Two minutes, 40 seconds. Next ... Two minutes, 53 seconds. Next ..."

'Why do I always pick the slow moving queue?'

'You've made fine progress since morning. You'll be first in line tomorrow.'

Instant Gratification service desk (with a long queue and delay)

"Today we practiced counting to five, and the teacher practiced counting to ten."

"He's beginning to find that homeworking is much harder than he thought."

"I'm not doing this because I like it. I'm doing this because I love you."

'I used to live for the moment, but now I'm comfortable waiting 3 to 5 business days.'

"I have a high tolerance for tedium."

Waiting For Godot And The Cable Guy

Fishing Arizona- waiting for a flash flood

office noise

Snail Crossing - Two skeletons in the car.

Three people waiting in a queue.