Pastries Gifts

'No Madam, we won't make you wait all day, we close in ten minutes...'

"Let's just go in and see what happens."

Lawyer to client: 'Yes, your turnover at the pastry shop would fall under tort law.'

'And your job is?' 'Putting the holes in the donuts.'

Heavy man wants the cake and Edith too.

'Pastry sniffing canine corporation' entering a 'Diet clinic dormitory'.

Croissant Neuf.

Tough day coach. What happened?...I think it's pretty obvious Frank...You can't win a ball game with that many turnovers!

Fat man in baker shop, "Sorry sir, I think you've had enough."

'Of all the places, you had to hold up a donut shop!'

'As far as clock watching goes, you take the biscuit.'

'Looks like a hollow point donut fired at close range. See the powdered sugar residue?'

'Miss Hartley, implement me a coffee and a cheese danish.'

'Guess what I've got for lunch today...a piece of my wife's delicious rum cake.'

'How much did you pay for it, and how long ago?'

"If you can get past the name, they really are quite delicious."

''Romantic'? No -- but it makes me feel like having a CROISSANT!'

3 D printing (Mille Feuille)

Paris is baffled - how did the best French secret agent "blow" his cover?

"Trust me, boss, he knows his pies...he just needs more retraining."

"Hey you...want a bunuelo?"

A slow Day on the Rolling News Channel

"It's called The Pastry Shop Mystery. A real Whodoughnut."

Donut shop given 4 star rating by the police department.

Pie

Muffin having visitation with another muffin in a bakery display case

"Ooo, are those macaroons fresh?"

"What do you have that justifies its calories?"

"Oh, boy, hard-core sugar!"

"I'm a monster."

SMARMLOAF

"Oooooh, I'll take the moon pie."

Rock 'n Rolls. It's like an ice cream truck, except they sell baked treats and play classic rock music. Rolling scones!

Yield. F&E Bakery. We're getting more dieters since they put that "yield" sign on the street out front.

I've got to monitor all chatter in the cafe to prevent future pastry thefts. I don't know … What if you've got a scone thief for a neighbor, or a friend, or even a family member? Sure, today it's just a scone. But the next attack could be huge – the big one! You don't mean … Hoagie. They're trying to destroy our whole way of life.