Passing Probation Pillows

"I'm pleased to say you have passed the trial period and exceeded our expectations."

Big Bang Theory.

"Yes Dad, I passed math and now I'm passing chemistry and physics."

Exam

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

'And what part of the formula don't you understand?'

Bob's Driving School.

"Well, sure. We could hire some Temps, but they only live about ten days."

GCSEs

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

Prosecution bears the burden of proof. Defense bears the burden of twisting and distorting said proof.

Yawning barristers in court

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

"Boy is he good! He's even got me convinced you're guilty!"

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

"I must protest, M'Lud. Prosecurity counsel is blantantly attempting to wheedle the truth from the accused."

"Sorry, we first have to do a background check."

"You've passed with extinction!"

'My client has required the services of countless law enforcement, court, penal and probation personnel. He's not a menace...he's a jobs creator!'

'I'm not working on a case, I'm looking for something interesting to read in the john.'

"I got probation."

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to sue, and he'll eat for a lifetime."

''Congress shall make no law'... now, I wonder what they meant by that...?'

'Yeah? -- Well, there's a thin line between being a strict constructionist and being a stupid jerk!'

'Judge Mental.'

Criminal Stupidness

Counsel examining witness

Two lawyers in a royal court

"I'm enjoying law school but I don't want to be known as the attorney from hell."

'You can't cash your paychecks until your 6 month probation is satisfactorily over.'

"We're studying the legal principles of 'crossing a heart and hoping to die'."

Pinocchio and Partners Lawyers.