Passed The Bar Exam Pillows

Slaps on the wrist.

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

Big Bang Theory.

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

"Yes Dad, I passed math and now I'm passing chemistry and physics."

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

Exam

I love Lawyers

Before the Internet

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

'Forget the DaVinci Code! I'm still trying to crack the tax code!'

Barristers

"Whoa, don't ask constitutional questions you don't want to know the answers to."

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

GCSEs

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

Junior barrister prompting a deaf and testy chief

Having been born with a birthmark that looks exactly like Asia and the Mideast, Russell was able to ace the geography portion of the SATs.

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

Truth

Law School teacher.

Planet of the Lawyers

"All the good ones are either married, gay or Viggo Mortensen."

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"We make crime pay."

"I felt I could make more of a difference within the system."

Prosecution bears the burden of proof. Defense bears the burden of twisting and distorting said proof.

Yawning barristers in court

'I'd like to go back to law school and pay attention this time.'

"Objection! Pummelling the witness."

Loopholes

Lady Justice.

Best System in the World

Robert Macaire as a Solicitor

"I must protest, M'Lud. Prosecurity counsel is blantantly attempting to wheedle the truth from the accused."