Party Storyteller T-Shirts

"Actually, I don't know anybody here. I was just passing the house when I heard all the fun."

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

'Well, he actually behaved pretty well for the first few minutes of the wedding ceremony....'

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

'It's a novel based on a movie adapted from a magazine article that was inspired by a video game.'

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'He was a handsome young prince when I married him.'

'Who I played in Summer Stock.'

',,,And we'd really like a heart for the Tin Man,,,'

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

Mark Knopfler.

After chasing the rabbit for many hours, Buster found himself very far from home indeed.

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

'It was a dark and stormy night. Also, there was a Catch-22.'

'How about having at least one character who's alive and wearing clothes?'

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

Daughters at Bedtime

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

Lute

Mother Goose Spoilers

"Start with a Spanish doubloon. Those are always good."

"A homeless person ate my homework."

Don Pasquale

Maestro

"Hang on! - we've possibly go another couple of films left in here!!"

Mother changing the words to 'this little piggy' to be more healthy

"It's a coming-of-middle-age story."

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"

'...in sickness or health, inflation or deflation,marriage tax credit or debit...'

"A plague of frogs? Awesome!"

'I could have been the next Neil Young, but my ol' man made me take singing lessons.'