Parrothead Pillows

'I've lost faith in what Warren Buffett says to do, so I'm switching to what Jimmy Buffett says.'

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Motor Tourism

"Harry Potter and the People Who Care Way Too Much About Harry Potter"

"If we only repeat what humans say whenever they're nearby... they won't realize we're aliens plotting to take over the planet."

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

"As I was only saying the other day..."

"Buzz off, Fly-boy. We don't need more accessories."

"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."

'I suppose you want Polly to forget she heard that.'

"Garbage in, garbage out!"

'Polly wants a cracker! Fetch!'

"I don't actually talk, I just mimic sounds."

Why would birdie need newspaper?

"What if we're just a ship in somebody's bottle? Yar, here comes me existential crisis."

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

'Never, Ever...drive 56 mph on a 55 mph freeway in a sporty red convertible.'

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

'You reek of crackers.'

"I'm pleased that you have finally come home, I can't get the parrot back into its cage."

"I told you not to polish the car too much."

"Well dudes, gotta go. My honey needs a lot of attention."

'Ok, who's been playing rap music in front of the bird?!'

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

A souped up car...

Oil shock.

"Rest assured, anything you say in this office won't get repeated by me."

Tune up $90. Tinker $20.

Big yellow sports utility vehicle.

'He looks exactly like his father!'

Hello City Pound? Please take my dog away.

"He can afford a bigger cage. His old tax forms line the bottom."

"D'you have any porn porn?"

"Do you think we should get a pet?"