Parking Ticket Collector Pillows

Penny Farthing in Giant Wheel Clamp.

'I don't care if he was the King of England, he owes us 528 years of parking charges.'

'Ignore it! It's just some of the local kids trying to get in for free.'

Reserved space is reserved for a dinner table.

Casino. Keno. $$$. Win. Cashier. He sure wins a lot! He's "Keno Savvy."

Bench clearing brawl, $5.

Ticket - At the Theatre in the Hay Market - The Authors Benefit Pasquin.

Tolls: Must have exact change and tails up.

Football Game Tickets. These seats are so far from the field we'll need a passport to get to them!

'Frank's last request was that he be cremated and that I never give up his season tickets.'

Teddy Bears Picnic - Tickets on sale here.

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

Hottest Tix in TownSpecial Mets promotion dates

'Oh no a speed camera.'

"He's upset I'm getting 36,000 points for speeding in one night."

Need tickets.

My army drill instructors license plate is HUP-2-3-4.

"There are 45,000 people at the stadium but only 500 of them bought tickets...the other ones are security guards for our 250 million euro player!"

'A fine? It's not as though I ran over more than one building inspector.'

The first recorded case of overbooking: Noah having to leave the Unicorns behind.

'Hold on to this ticket. Immediately after armageddon, there'll be a drawing for door prizes!'

A electrically-powered man checks tickets on the bumper cars.

'Quicker to cycle anyway, mate...'

"Okay, forget the cookies. How about tickets? I've got a couple of good seats for sale to the Rangers' game."

"Fifty yard line! I bet you thought it was a silly necklace..."

'Oh my God, they took my World Cup tickets!!!'

"I've got a couple of tickets for Wild Bill's 'Wild West Show'.. only $800 each!"

Car parked illegally has 'divorce attorney on call' sign in window.

Solar Storm Expected!

"Do you, Paul Bergerson, take this traffic ticket..."

'Damn, so close!'

I've stopped you so often I've decided to give you a season ticket!

"You're not a bad dog for driving. You're a bad dog for not wearing a seat belt."

You need to start formulating a plan to secure your financial future.

'After you finish validating me,could you validate my parking receipt,doctor?'