Parking Rebel Gifts

Need ticket.

"No parking: Cars will be towed, stripped and sold to chop shops in New Jersey at owner's expense."

"I knew I should have checked the meter."

'You know, King Richard here hasn't paid for his parking space since 1485. Who do I send the bill to?'

"I was merely signifying - don't give me two tickets."

Handicap Parking Only - Ticket Odds 4 to 1.

Warning: Any car found parked outside this building will be clumped.

Little girl dangling from her horse track.

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

"I think he's overreacting a little when it comes to controlling his employees."

"Fresh pepper spray?"

Unrest Area.

Office: Empowerment Drawer.

A souped up car...

"No. I wouldn't 'like to see the cheese menu'. And I don't appreciate the stereotyping!"

'They traded their 'Casual Fridays' for 'Immature Mondays' . '

"What, exactly, did you say to the maître d'?"

'I'd like a few words with you Farnsworth. Aren't those my shoes you're wearing?'

Fisherman has his dinghy punctured by a swordfish.

"I'm sorry, Uncle Ed. I just couldn't save the poor ol' thing. You want to shoot it, or shall I?"

Executive Lifestyle

"Not only is it a planet the same size as earth but is has plenty of parking."

"Saints preserve us! The boulevardier got another jaywalking ticket."

'I think you are over-reacting Mr. Brown. You were charged a mandatory basic parking fine. I don't think we need to talk about taking your case to the European Court of Human Rights in Strasbourg.'

"You know... this would be as good a time as any to rotate the tyres."

It's a nice apartment but I don't want to pay my share of the national debt for rent.

"Let me see if I have it correctly, sir. To hell with the appetizer. A chopped sirloin that damn well better be rare. No goddam relish tray. Who cares which salad dressing, since they all taste like sludge?"

"This isn't the employee retention program I had envisioned."

'Alright, alright... go ahead and have a pony tail!'

Office with a fake suggestion box.

'Those responsible for setting the cafeteria ablaze while burning you in effigy have yet to step forward, sir.'

It says if we give up our tea breaks, we can retire three years earlier.

Generation Rend. Young man rending his garments in anguish at extortionate rents.

Michael Schumacher

"As far as I'm concerned any whistleblower who wants to sell out their colleagues and wreck their career is very brave...now what did you want to tell me?"