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No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

Vehicles are having their own election. These are the candidates. The ambulance appeals to voters who think health care is most important. Voters focusing on education issues favor the school bus. And those wanting family-friendly policies are backing the minivan. The tractor is an expert on agricultural issues, and the import is a free trade advocate. Those voters concerned about environmental issues like the electric hybrid, and those wanting a strong military support the Jeep. What's t

"I hear you bought a new classic car."

Micro Psychiatry Clinic. You have a full schedule today, Doctor. The helium atom will be here to work on his fear of heights. The white blood cell with a germ phobia and amoeba with separation anxiety are coming in. The DNA molecule will be here about an identity crisis. And here, in the sports car, comes a new patient, a carbon-14 isotope. Ah, looks like he's going through a half-life crisis!

Sailor in Car.

"What old school? This is my life."

"As you can hear, it has an engine that purrs ... '

'Lover's lance isn't the same as it used to be!'

Excess Baggage: In the old days folks called 2 weeks with 4 kids in a non-air conditioned car a vacation.

"Maybe I'm aiming too high...maybe 'saving for a cool car' is too hard."

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

It's great for pulling the birds!

"Another reckless baby driver! I'd arrest the whole lot of them if they weren't so damn cute."

Caution (arrow falling from sky sign)

Fred interpreted the word compact as a verb, not as an adjective.

"Pumpkin spice has been very good to me."

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'

(I ride a harley, I drive a porsche, I smoke cigars, I drink martinis...) (So, ….You're impotent?)

Penguin Remote

"Nothing serious - just some twenties stuck in your crankshaft."

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

'Oh - go get yourself a porsche.'

"Of course I believe in unions - Where do you think we doctors would be without the A.M.A.?"

"That's weird. The app says to look for a Nissan Sentra."

'Mom, dad's toasting the new year with the car again!'

Dog wiping windscreen with tail

'If only you could do this with a cow once in a week, we'd save a lot of money for the food delivery service, Rupert!'

"The good news is that a delicious stick of jerky is still a very affordable seventy-five cents."

Carpet

'I'm OK, but the car is in 'intensive care'!'

Beware of Everything

The slug replaces the cheetah as the fastest animal on earth.

The Lemmings of Montauk