Parked Car Aficionado T-Shirts

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

"I hear you bought a new classic car."

Sailor in Car.

"What old school? This is my life."

"As you can hear, it has an engine that purrs ... '

'Lover's lance isn't the same as it used to be!'

Excess Baggage: In the old days folks called 2 weeks with 4 kids in a non-air conditioned car a vacation.

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

"Another reckless baby driver! I'd arrest the whole lot of them if they weren't so damn cute."

It's great for pulling the birds!

Caution (arrow falling from sky sign)

Fred interpreted the word compact as a verb, not as an adjective.

"Pumpkin spice has been very good to me."

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'

(I ride a harley, I drive a porsche, I smoke cigars, I drink martinis...) (So, ….You're impotent?)

Penguin Remote

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

"Nothing serious - just some twenties stuck in your crankshaft."

'Oh - go get yourself a porsche.'

'Mom, dad's toasting the new year with the car again!'

"The good news is that a delicious stick of jerky is still a very affordable seventy-five cents."

'If only you could do this with a cow once in a week, we'd save a lot of money for the food delivery service, Rupert!'

The slug replaces the cheetah as the fastest animal on earth.

The Lemmings of Montauk

"That's weird. The app says to look for a Nissan Sentra."

'I'm OK, but the car is in 'intensive care'!'

Dog wiping windscreen with tail

'Your car's ready, but drive carefully for awhile. I had to give the student an 'F' for the work he did on it.'

Beware of Everything

Carpet