Parents With Young Kids Mugs

"No kidding? And it took me 20 minutes to climb up here!"

'Look,Mum, that poor man's got toothache too!'

"Ooooh, Mommy...do these things come with instructions?"

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

"That table is yours once that party decides to move to the suburbs."

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's having a wardrobe malfunction!'

Toddler Feeding Solutions

"And this is our son Danny's room. Danny is being raised by wolves."

"Yes, Donald, I know you didn't expect a test today... that's why it's called a pop quiz!"

"Me? I thought you were raising them."

Dad Planet: 'Hey you KIDS! I thought i said no ORBITING in the house!'

"The sellers had a lot of kids, so they got tired of running out of hot water. So they upgraded."

Kindergarten Primary School Teacher

Early Night Club

Lemonade 5c Sugar Free: 'It sure is!'

Baby eating "Uploading", Baby on toilet "Downloading"

"We couldn't find a sitter."

"I'm going to need a pediatrician, two vets and an ornithologist."

"A five, six, seven, eight, Mooooom!"

Childhood's End

'We lease the children, of course!'

'Sorry, sweetie -- they're not that kind of cookies.'

'Watch out for my little brother -- he's clothing-optional.'

MEN, WOMEN, 'What are KIDS supposed to do?'

'I told him that you said people should share things with the less fortunate!'

"Your turn to put them to bed."

Dog with a dummy.

'I went to school with Mary today: Boy that was fun!!' (colour)

'I need a helping hand.'

Santa-Claus-Trophobia

'I may lose the connection intermittently.'

Hug Robot going silent

They actually like captivity so much that they even want their children to have their own little cage.

"Tell me truthfully, mummy, was I adopted?"

"You wanted to sleep in bed with us- start proofing these briefs."