Parenting Prospector Pillows

'Where's her volume control.'

'I forgot to bring diapers. We were a long way from refreshing.'

'I'm sure my parents will be relieved they won't have to shell out money for an expensive college.'

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

"Well, I'm thinking about boarding school. Though I'm not sure they accept adults."

'When do they learn to stand upright?'

"Not until you've arranged your pillows."

You are here

'We're getting closer - That's a goldfish.'

"Trepanning for gold"

"For five starts it's worth the trip."

Going into the relationship, Tom knew Loretta was a package deal.

"It's quiet in here. I suppose it's off the popular tourist route!"

"Seventy-seven. How about yours."

'My kids don't understand me.'

"Yes, but the trouble is he always wears that mysterious smile."

'What a coincidence....that's my mum's name to!'

"I'm trying to find a new element."

"I'm sleeping in today. I got in late from last night's orgy."

'He was raised by sparrows!'

"We want one that's genetically gifted but not genetically spoiled."

"Is it wrong to be evasive and not answer questions?"

"What's it like to be the parent of a nonhuman?"

'Looks like Timmy got solitary.'

'Talk about advanced technology! It even has a beer holder!'

'Oh, I'm not looking for Gold, I'm checking for bear-traps...'

"If there are nuggets in the sluice, let's dine out tonight."

A comment on the Gold Rush.

Ingredients: me

Wagon

'You're too heavy on metals and too light on equities.'

'This is such an appropriate way for us to celebrate our GOLDEN wedding anniversary."

'Look, Charlie, it's a bonanza!'

Baby Philosophy.

'Well, Mr. 'Let's get him a fish they're no trouble at all,' you're on.'