Parenting Advice Seeker Gifts

'Don't you realize, Jason, that when you throw furniture out of the window and tie your sister to a tree, you make Mommy and Daddy very sad.'

"Mother, I get enough pressure from my peer group without getting it from you."

'Hey?!'

'I knew things were getting out of hand when I went from snips, to snails, to puppy dogs tails....'

"I told you not to touch it. I should've used your language and told you not to click on it."

'He's more supportive after his nap.'

"And you call yourself a marsupial?"

'I should have listened to my Mum, she always said, 'Never underestimate how fast a zebra can run'.'

'I've fallen in love and i've fallen in porage and believe me: porage is better.'

'Oh, we don't actually teach math any more ? we found it was too hard on the kids' self-esteem.'

Son, it's time you grew some legs and moved out.

"Other than being sent to the principal's office, my detention, and three day suspension, school was good."

'My mom just explained babies to me. I'm not sure, but I think I'm a bird and you're a bee.'

"I couldn't find a sitter."

young mother with a baby being bombarded by advice on parenting from older mothers

'Oh, for heaven's sake. Ethan's having another growth spurt.'

"His room is always clean. Do you think we should take him to a psychologist?"

"Go ask your mother."

Parental guidance suggested but no longer expected.

"If it's important to you, Jessica. It's important to daddy, but I don't think it's important to you."

"Sorry, son. . . You're not getting the keys to the car until you show me you're mature enough to bring it back completely totaled."

"Of course, you've always set a good example for me ... that's why you embarrass me so much."

"And I suppose if your friends all jumped off a cliff you'd follow right along?"

"Do you provide any coupons that would allow me one free lie? It would help ease my conscience."

'I don't mind them, but I would like to see my daughter getting married to one of them!'

"Don't make me come over there."

A Victorian park.

"I'm confused....you always say not to take candy from strangers, but tonight you tell me to go to strangers and ask for candy!"

'Your phone isn't wireless, Dad. I found some wires in it right here.'

"No thanks! My dad said those things will kill you!"

$200,000 to raise a kid in America! Do you regret the expense? Of course not, sweetie! You're worth every cent. That's a relief. Because I need $20 for the movies!

‘Sat too close to the TV;’ ‘Stared at the Sun For an Hour,’ ‘Put Out My Eye With a BB Gun.’

"I don't have a story, Tommy. I can offer a retrospective of your day, followed by a deep-dive to identify opportunities for improvement."

"Baldo, school has always been about learning, expanding your mind, becoming a better person."

'Congradulations, daddy! Daddy! Daddy!'