Parenthood Chaos Lover T-Shirts

Lemonade: Buy 2 cups, get one of my parents' private home videos free"

Face painting.

'Hi hon! How's the little monster?'

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

"I need to know who started it."

Mayhem, Inc. Part 21

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

'I'm just exercising my first amendment rights.'

"There, all neat and tidy!"

'Congratulations on your purchase of the new Kablooey! Desk Organizer! Instructions for use...'

"I couldn't possibly lick another baby right now."

"She was right -- Her teddy bear did squish your action figure!"

"Tracy Island offers palatial splendour in the safest of environments. Your beds are unmade because this is Tracy Emin Island."

'You know that bottle of ink that was standing on the desk...?'

"I fell in the mud again. Maybe I need a stunt double."

Two children play with a pedal bin

"The children took off their own coats this morning, Pastor."

'Dad won't buy me a puppy, so I'm teaching him to bark!'

The Difficulties of Transporting Boats

Unsafe Drain Covers!

Lab studies suggest that a human growth pill is just around the corner.

"A chewed slipper? I love it. No, really."

'What's our stockbroker doing in the shower? Quick! Run and get me a rolled up copy of the Wall Street Journal!'

'And this is what Larry calls his 'man cave'.'

Fetching some bread

Maternity Arrivals

"The lunch, grab the lunch!"

Wind shear - 81 st and Lex

"Can't you just relax and enjoy my childhood."

This must be the address where Joe and Maureen are throwing the dinner party!

"We've completely child-proofed our home."

Although in hindsight, maybe she said feed the cat and water the plants.

'How many kids do you actually have?'

At the McWit Eye Labs are two doors, 'Control Group' and 'Out of Control Group.'