Parental Escapism Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Sounds like all the kids are already here for the labor day picnic... I think I'll wait in the car.'

'I said you're next, Hibblemeyer. . . Hibblemeyer!'

'No hay, no grooming, no mucking out and they live in the broom cupboard!'

I've decided to run for office so I can spend more time away from my family.

"It's all about putting work into the right perspective...and this helps me!"

Baby with a full diaper 'Load Rage'

"Oh please, go on, just for the weekend."

"No, son, there's no severance package."

'To attract the most talented spies we're changing our package . . . to jammie dodgers and a gobstopper.'

“Here’s to the 240 bucks we’re paying the sitter.”

"This is highly confidential, so, yes, we built a little fort."

Mountain escalator.

Dating... In the age of the coronavirus

'The great stampedes are over, son. All you can hope for today is an occasional goring.'

'Well those stair gates were a complete waste of money'

Supermom meets her match - super kid.

Site Safety: Minutes Since Last Accident.

Pure unfiltered escapism vs abject despair

A sign giving directions to 'it all' and 'away from it all'.

Mom? Any chance you could take the kids to your friend's lake cabin? Trying to get them out of your house? Roger. I want to put the vacate" back in vacation.

"Now that the kids are in jail, maybe we can take the vacation we always wanted."

Fairy Library - Jack and the Fairy Harp Escaping the Giant

After several years of legal wrangling, the Nirawana authorities signed an extradition order for us to be shipped back to Reality from where we had escaped 16 years before.

'Let's turn the TV off, I fancy some escapism.'

"The city life isn't for everyone, so my second house is in the Hamptons."

'You've got to admit, it's an effective witness protection program!'

'That's the plan then, gang. We all move in with Bruno on bath nights!'

In Case of Emergency Break Glass.

"According to my fantasy sports site, I don't want to grow up."

"He used art to break down barriers. That, of course, and the sledge hammer."

Now that he had done all the big adult stuff, maybe everybody would just leave him alone.

Sad beggar sitting against wall with picture of desert island painted on it

"Your babysitter just rang, she wants to know where you keep your condoms?"

Parents everywhere: There's no shelter in place.

"I'm afraid you could do better work in order to get your daughter into this school."