Parent-child Discussion Pillows

"I have a healthy skepticism of what's reported to me as 'fact'."

"What's that mark on your arm, Mama?"

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

"I got all Z's because I fell asleep in class."

'I have answers to the kind of questions no one likes to ask.'

'She knew we'd try to talk her-out of it.'

'Every child is an artist but it appears your Candice is a plumber.'

"Sorry I'm late with my grades. I was busy removing the 'Honor Roll' bumper sticker from the car."

'If you don't behave we'll unfreeze your stem cells!'

"I'm sorry-his I.Q. is actually on the charts."

Young Godzilla.

'I called you in to talk to you about your son not being able to sit still.'

"I didn't know you could do worse than an F. When did they start handing out poop emojis?"

"When I grow up, I want to impeach a president."

"...some of these tadpoles may not be yours."

'Dad, try to catch some jellyfish to go with my peanut butter.'

'No, you can't turn your vegetables into bio-fuel.'

PTA Meeting Tonight: Parents,Teachers,Attorneys

'The ‘class clown' thing is my fault. I totally misjudged the crowd.'

"Lately, I've begun to understand - and forgive - my parents."

'It's all right with me if you go out, but you'll have to file a flight plan with your father.'

"So which bit do you think was 'nature' and which 'nurture'?"

'She's taking Chinese and algebra this semester. Go on, Francine, speak a little algebra for them...'

We're waiting to see if he'll see his shadow.

'It's not my fault. Bad grades wouldn't matter if I had been born rich.'

"My mom says I can start a rock band if I call it 'I Love My Mommy.' You in?"

"Benny has a little too much aptitude for art."

"Hey, mom! That 'F' I got in history...my creative writing teacher read it and gave me an 'A'."

Our staff are very pleased, she's one of the brightest in her class. (What do you expect? I'm a genius!) I don't know where she gets it from...

Eskimo mom to kid: 'I can't believe you had a brain freeze during the test on the Ice Age.'

'And then Mindy had the nerve to call me a 'helicopter mom.' Me? In this wonderful jetpack! As if!'

"He's very smart. We just need to work on his focus."

Teaching kids to count is fine - teaching kids what counts is best.

"My mom still makes all my clothes by hand."