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Extreme Sisyphus

"What a tragedy... he still had two years of his super left..."

'The economy being what it is, we've had to make a few changes in your retirement plan. . .'

"People are looking for stability in pension arrangements..."

"Apparently over 50% of people never look at their pension plans!"

"Still, he might be remembered as the 'no cloning' President."

"You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!"

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

'Remember that outfit, Miss Wilson, that you said you wouldn't be seen dead wearing?'

"I just learned that my golden parachute was not properly packed."

Man In The Stocks Used As A Clock

'You got twenty years for hunting without a license? Kind of stiff, isn't it?'

'When bad 401ks happen to good people'

Passing the Pension Time Bomb

Retirement Issues

'He intentionally entangles his face mask in my hand!'

"I'm the ghost of your future retirement."

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

"The real trick will be enjoying retirement long enough before the Government goes belly up."

'I re-invested what was left of my 401K into returnable pop cans. I figure by the time I retire I should have about three dollars.'

'Holding! Number 74 on the offense!... Fifteen years to life in prison...'

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

A confinement of convicts

"Walter Thruggins, My Life as a Pensions Adviser."

'Sorry I can't pay your pension until I see gray hair. . . Oh yes, and you also get disability.'

"I've changed the company's name, Edith. Ours, of course, will remain the same."

"My inner child just turned 62. Where's his money?"

Man to lady: 'Prisons are overcrowded, so we're seeing more sentences of timeout instead.'

'At last you can put your feet up and concentrate on worrying about your pension.'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

'Congratulations. Your old bloated 401K is now valued as a lean, mean 199F!'

'I'm new here. What type of retirement plan do they offer?'