Paranormal Pal Gifts

"Finally, Miss Big-Shot calls her dead mother!"

'So, Al, how are you getting along with Criswell?'

'I'm minding it for a friend.'

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

Braiding a Horse's Tail

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

Secret footage from Roswell, shows an alien and debris from a crashed UFO

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

'... And this is my cellar.'

'Alone for the weekend at last!'

Paranormal A-Z...

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

Out To Lurch

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

Ghost School.

'Your videotape's intriguing - But it still doesn't prove that they really exist.'

Astral Projection

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

"Would the widdle Venus fly trap like a fly? You'll have to beg for it."

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."

New Road Signs to Watch For:

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

'We need you to settle a bet -- was 'Twilight Zone' a sitcom or a documentary?'

"Oh boy charades! I love charades! Something big? Is it a bird? It's sharp! Behind? Above?"

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

Quantum Psychic

I crawled out of a toilet and ate a guy. Say my name 3 times in a mirror. I dare you. No one suspects I'm Slenderman. She took me home. Then she woke up in a tub of ice missing a kidney. Urban Legends-in-Their-Own-Minds.

"Had more ghost-hunters 'round my place last night....scared the daylights outta me!"

"Fantastic! Do you realize what we've just stumbled upon? It's the fabled Lost Glove Compartment of the Ancient Astronauts!"

'I'm the ghost of Christmas future. I'm hammered, can we do this later...?'

Channelling on the Cheap

Ghostbasters 3

He snuck in on me again, didn't he.