Paper Pusher Gifts

Desk bins: 'Too much information,' 'Not enough,' 'Just right.'

Attention Span Remaining: 3 minutes, 27 seconds.

'911!'

'Sure, we could make it simpler but that would only complicate matters.'

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

'He's the most important man here - He writes the compliance procedures for the DEPARTMENT of Compliance!'

"You busy?"

'I'm sorry, sir, this is the department of Immediate Dissatisfaction. Your appointment is with the Bureau of Eternal Frustration.'

'I have to hang up. I only have an hour to get these reports done.'

"There's a moving truck backing up to our loading dock. Maybe they're delivering the government regulatory guidelines."

'Take this report and put it into the form of a bumper sticker.'

'What's my secret? I never left work last night.'

'Life is an adventure son, so don't get bogged down with the paperwork. Unless, of course, you go into accounting. In which case, forget the whole adventure thing.'

Bureaucraze...

"In principle I agree that staff have far to much pointless paperwork to fill in."

"I thought that modern communications systems were meant to be more efficient...That they would cut down on waste and duplication."

'The job's not finished, until the paperwork's done.'

Bureaucracy gone mad!

'I came in early to get a jump on the day, but it jumped me first.'

'Of course there are more bureaucrats than field workers! It's more fun to create regulation, than to actually enforce it!'

Love me, Love my documents.

'Want to trade ruts for a while?'

Work avalanche

"When you said you were going climbing, I thought you meant on rocks, not paperwork."

'When they say EVERY possible risk needs a sign I don't think they meant you!'

Input (not yours) and Output (only mine).

"More ruddy training. . . As if I haven't got enough to do!"

The Desk Bins of Life: Birth, Whoosh! and Death.

"I really believe red tape is the future!"

Herb has a brief but intense near-life experience.

Day Late and $Short.

'One moment, please.'

The Bureaucrats

Department to Control Government Growth - 'We need more room.'

'This will be your office.'