Paper Jam Enthusiast Gifts

The copier is making a whining noise.

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

'Pick a contract...any contract!'

Shake it all about sign on desk

'The whole floor got together and came up with a few things you could work on.'

In, out, shake it all about.

'Did you get the hard copy from Mr. Dawson?'

'You can come down a peg. Mesopotamia gave the world bureaucracy, you know.'

Desk trays - 'In', 'Out', and 'It depends'.

Trays on desk read: In/Out/Lose in the Shuffle.

"'Fried Ham' on 3..."

"Why, if it isn't Henshaw caught in the Overtime Warp again."

'Good new. . . we're moving you to a bigger desk!'

Guitarist: 'We can freely improvise some other time ... now let's practise.' (With Derek it was always jam tomorrow)

Dog bringing paper and paper boy.

"Just as I thought! You used our competitor's paper for your resume!"

Whack, Out of Whack.

In/Out Tray.

"Who ever said 'there's a time and a place for everything' never worked in this office!"

-"Wife and kids?" -"No, a photo of a set of beautifully prepared accounts."

'OK, who moved the photocopier?'

'Sorry I'm not at the meeting, sir

Cut out and keep your own Jane Austen.

'Could you guys play a slow number so my gal and I can dance?'

'Of course I'd never fire you, Nelson. You've been working here for such a long time, you've become part of the furmiture!'

"He's my hero. At 5 he just knocks everything off his desk and calls it a day."

'Remember, Preston, all work and no play make you employed.'

In-tray, Out-tray, While you were on holiday-tray

'Making staff get a sick note after one day is essential if we're to make the whole system work more efficiently!'

'I put Wilson on your project and last I heard he was all over it!'

'Well, there goes the last of my New Years resolutions...'

"Not succinct or to the point Ambrose...just how we like it!"

I play the guitar. Deal with it.