Panic Buy Enthusiast T-Shirts

"What we didn't have but obviously needed was an alarmist."

'Well, well - this should create a nice little wave of panic and hysteria.'

The End is Nigh

"Forget it – we're not buying some expensive sex robot for it to end up unused in the garage with the massaging armchair and the rowing machine."

Capitalism gone nuts!

"It's almost flu season! Stay indoors! Touch no one!"

"They're willing to throw in their kidneys."

Panic Button

Flush Direct

"For God's sake, man, just tell me what we're running from!"

'Quick! sell me a lure,any lure,I just found an empty compartment in my tackle box.'

"... And you said this was you and your husband's first time shopping at Costco?"

"I know we don't have a garden, but I panicked!"

"Don't blame me, it was you who suggested meeting outside of a shoe shop."

Family size, economy size, giant size

'That's the best thing about economy size - one can use double the quantity.'

"Anybody want to merge with a steel mill?"

"What? The market didn't break a record today? Now where did I put my panic button?"

"Dad, I made a mistake. A big mistake."

Professor Yomp inserts ecology into his economic formula: "We're doomed!"

"Did you order 8000 tins of beans, 10,000 litres of water, 400 bottles of vitamins C tablets, 500 rolls of tin foil. . ."

'Once you get the hang of it, crisis management is fairly straightforward.'

"Hello. . . Police? We've been burgled! The bastards have taken all of our soap, hand sanitiser and toilet rolls!"

"This pandemic's made me stop, reflect and think about the important things in life - the things we forgot to panic buy and hoard!"

"Costco."

British Weather Bureau Symbols

"Ooh, I need this!"

"Norman's been panic buying Jerry Cans."

"Can Jonny come out to panic-buy with us?"

First Wave. Second Wave.

"Panic-buying in expectation of a public sector strike."