Pampering Enthusiast Pillows

"No, I don’t need a wake-up call, but can someone tuck me in?"

'Let me know if it works - I'll try some on the roses!'

Hog's Heaven Travel,,,Pampered Luxury,

"I still say you're spoiling that dog!"

Spa

Bad hair day!

"Can you make me look like Wolverine?"

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"Another one so relaxed, she couldn't walk out of here."

Dating is so expensive...

"Absolutely not!"

Pampered and poodled.

Emergency numbers on a telephone.

What price beauty?

"I don't like your application."

The Cat Spa

'Nobody minds if I take the ocean view suite with complimentary champagne and Sven, the in-room Swedish masseur, do they?'

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

'I'm not begging, I've just painted my claws.'

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

It was time for a little bit of lady admin

New Twenty Blades

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

"We're having a make up test at school. Can I borrow your mascara?"

Mirror mirror...

'This is a very powerful perfume -- there's a ten-day waiting period.'

'Well you tried, but be sure to keep Proof of Purchase.'

'Botox...'

"More concealer?"

'I have to admit I was skeptical at first, but their hooves are magical, Magical, I say!'