Overwhelmed Shopper T-Shirts

"I just want Velveetaaaaaaa!"

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

Smart card.

'C'mon! Speed it up! I've got a bottle of wine here that says it's meant to be drunk soon!'

Woman uses an ATM with buttons for: Grocery, Leverage Buyout, Start Up Capital, Shop Till You Drop.

"Hey, I just got a burst of consumer confidence- let's go buy something."

Buy on-line - Fill in form, Fill in form again, And again, Lose form, Fill-in form a few more times, Give up and go to shop...

"I've been window-shopping..."

'I went to see a personal shopper this afternoon. . . I thought I'd surprise you!'

"What kind of bra are you looking for?"

"I don't know about you, but I don't like being a high school guidance counselor."

"I invented 'shopping' and I haven't seen my wife since."

I brake for all 50 off Sales.

Customer Service - I don't know and I don't care.

Work Life Balance Paperwork

'It was an impulse buy Mary. At 75 percent off in the New Year sale AND free home delivery. . .'

'I'm having a day when I can't catch up!'

'Hi, yourself.'

It says 'item is returnable if repackaged exactly as sent.'"

Serious Competition: Thingymajigs vs Watchamacallits.

Supermarket trolley repairs

"Will your spiritual journey take you anywhere near the shops?"

"Happy Easter!"

"Tag sale next door!"

"I was at home all day yesterday so when do I want you to re-deliver? Yesterday!"

Snowman tries on carrot noses.

'Sorry sir, no personal trolleys allowed in the store.'

"Your card is overwrought."

"It's the absolute latest thing to have before the next thing comes along!"

'Make-up? Aisle three.'

"Money talks. It says, 'spend me'."

What's the sale price on scones? Zero percent off. It's a sale in name only. I see. How many can I get at the sale price? The sale mentality mocks me.

Customer Avoidance Dept.

'I hardly missed you, thanks to the internet.'

'Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.' - 'Blah, blah, blah.' - 'Ahem.' - 'Blah, blah, blah, blah.' - 'Blah, blah.' - 'Excuse me.' - 'Does it look like we want to help you?!' -